Writing your own wedding vows is an important and beautiful undertaking. It’s a chance to express to your partner all the love, dreams, and promises that you have for them. While it may feel like a lot of work, it’s well worth the effort—you’re opening up, being vulnerable, sharing your true feelings with your partner, and expressing your hopes and dreams for the future.
5 essentials to include in your wedding vows
When writing your wedding vows, there are a few key elements to keep in mind. Think of these as the starting point (the must-haves) and then expand from there if you want!
How long should your vows be?
Typically, personal wedding vows are around 1 to 3 minutes per person. I’ve witnessed longer vows many times in my career as an elopement and wedding photographer, but that certainly isn’t necessary.
Start by brainstorming
Even if you aren’t a hopeless romantic, you can still write heartfelt, meaningful wedding vows. Take some time to write down your thoughts (however random they might be) about your partner, your thoughts on marriage, and your hopes for the future.
Use emotions and feelings
The words you use during your wedding ceremony will stay with you forever, which is why it’s important to understand the emotions and feelings that drive them. Take time to reflect on all the moments that brought you together – the laughter, tears, joys, and sorrows – and try to capture the emotion behind it in your words.
Include a story
Think about how you met, how things began between you two, defining moments of your relationship, and how far you have come together. This will help guide what values and goals for life together you want to express in your vows.
The best advice I can give you is to just be yourself! If you’re a person of very few words, keep your vows straight and to the point. You don’t need to be a writer or a poet. If you’re lighthearted and goofy, include elements of humor or funny stories from your shared experiences to make your vows more “you”.
This is just a really helpful thing to do if you are worried about feeling awkward or rushing through your vows! You can write yourself little notes to remind yourself to:
- Slow down!
- Take a pause in a certain spot to allow words to sink in.
- Remember to BREATHE.
- Or anything else you want to remember in the moment!
Examples of wedding vows
Short and sweet
“(Name), from the moment we met, I knew you were something special. You are caring, compassionate, and creative, and you make me laugh like no one else. You’ve made me a better person, and I make it my life’s mission to cherish and honor you each day. Our journey together has been one for the books, filled with laughter and love. I’ll always remember the time we shared our first kiss. My heart was beating so fast, and I was so nervous! In you, I see all of the strength and beauty that makes me proud to call you my partner in life. My heartfelt vow is to always be your cheerleader, lover, and friend – showing up with an open heart to explore this world by your side. I promise to support you and care for you in your brightest and darkest moments. Deeply and completely, I love you today and forevermore.”
“(Name), I love you with my entire being – I know, not the most creative way to start off! But it felt important to get that out of the way. I’m here for you no matter what life throws at us – through tears and laughter, sickness and health, and even when you choose your cat over me. We have so many stories together already, both big and small. I can’t wait for the stories we make together in the future. I promise to always honor our history, keep looking forward to an ever-evolving future, and create new memories every single day. I promise not to get mad when you forget our anniversary. I promise to unclog the shower drain even though only one of us has long hair. I’m so excited to: support your dreams, learn everything about you (even if it takes a lifetime), never stop growing our love together, and enjoy each moment we share as one.”
Writing personalized vows during this special occasion marks a milestone in starting off a new journey together! Keep these tips in mind when crafting yours so they will be memorable expressions of love that last throughout time and space!